Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Love, No Sex and a Little Dhoka

The content of the blog is a little personal, however, time has shifted enough in a direction that it can be put in a blog. This is not an attempt to eradicate my image of a pessimistic realist, I ll always be one. However, this is more of what can happen to you, if you can shed your fears and pretensions, as it happened to me once.

I once wrote a letter to someone, not in mail, but a handwritten one, which I happened to come across today, as I was packing my things. I felt, I should keep it safe in somewhere, which will not get misplaced as easily as a piece of paper can, over a period of time. Not that it always does.

For the many mails and letters and etc, that men have written to women, not all have got unanswered. Even this one, I wrote, got a fitting response. As far as the title of the post goes, it has got little to do with the content. I think that is the convention now a days. I just tried to play smart like them. The letter is unchanged as what I had written that day, to preserve what it does hold in it.

I am X, she is Y.

Y,

I woke up early today in the morning. I was feeling different from the other mornings. I realised a sense of longing towards you. I fight with myself to remain a man of zero expectations. But, couldn't today. It has been a wonderful experience to interact with you, especially over the last two days. I think you have provoked my imagination. I love the state of my mind. I love the feeling that I have experienced because of you. Keeping in mind of everything, I want to dream again after years. I'll miss you after you leave this place. I like to write. However, I am writing after five years. I spoke about what I expect of someone, whom I love yesterday. I want her to understand, appreciate, inspire and love me.I dont know whether you understand me, or appreciate me or love me. But the fact that I am writing today is a miracle for me. You have inspired me. Dreams have not ended well for me, mostly. But, several times in my life, I have dreamt about something or the other. However, time has taught me to suppress my dreams. Today I want to express my emotions.
Should I dream?
Your music, which I hear in my heart, will linger for a long time even if it's heard no more. But, I really wish to prolong this feeling and the sense of beauty of the dream I'm seeing with you.
What do you think about us, ie you and me?

X

The fitting response, that followed however was complex for me to understand at that point of time. I shall not make fun in this blog. So keeping in mind of the tempo of the blog, I wish to say that I do understand it better at this date.

X,

We always believe that life is fair
No Matter how unfair we are -

Let me Believe that once again
& wish that it gives me
at least one more chance
to think, to ponder & still
after all that ......... follow
Our Instincts -

It was gr8 being with you. Hope to c ya soon.

Be yourself and get over that 'laziness' of not wanting to try things.

Y

I wish to conclude by typing down a quote by Nietzsche and I'm not paraphrasing.

"The demand to be loved is the greatest of all arrogant presumptions."

4 comments:

  1. very uncharacteristic... yet characteristic of u :P

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  2. dhoka in love is just like the scent of a incense sticks.....keeps lingering for a long time...similar was my feeling just after reading this post....

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  3. @those, who were searching for the dhoka part, complained it is missing: love is a little dhoka :P

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  4. abey apni personal ki ***** kyun kar raha hai be:p letter to mast hai bole to dil ki baat matlab bandi ne ghuma dia tere ko LOL....uska reply to dekho kya diplomatic hai :D

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